Broken Hinges

Snigdho Dip Howlader
2 min readJan 27, 2021

Mother’s custard tasted the best,
Loved me with all her will endlessly.
It was all so simple back then I didn’t bother,
I was ready to do whatever needed, carelessly.

Stepping into the 8th year of existence,
Life was seemingly not simple anymore.
They were putting me through a hell I was not aware of,
Down to my very core.

As they put a yellow wristband on me,
As they wanted me to survive their challenges.
I started to see what I was getting into,
My sanity began to creak at it’s hinges.

Five years of hell I survived,
Being judged with numbers of so many sorts.
I had forgotten what comfort felt like,
Sleeping began to be struggle, without snores or snorts.

Turning 12, they told me my purpose,
Why I was bred into existence in the very first place.
Putting armor all over my face and skin,
I felt power and a disturbing aura in my grace.

They sent us over to the devil’s island,
To exterminate the insects that I thought they were.
Unfortunately, one of us did not survive the journey,
Saving me from the embrace of death as I stared.

They did not wish to continue this journey,
But I denied their request as the willful leader.
I made them believe in themselves and I marched on,
To destroy the walls that held them in so dear.

My sanity did not hold itself attached anymore,
I could not tell reality from fiction.
Am I a friend of theirs or a foe?
It all feels like a complete contradiction.

Little brother of mine looked upto me so dearly,
I saw nothing but myself live within him.
Why did it have to be you, you willful one?
Why did it have to be a reality so grim?

I lost my mind to the point where I told brother the truth,
He was so lost and in shock.
Friend of mine reminded me what it was that we came for.
I felt myself be in complete mock.

Why was I so desperate to receive my family’s love?
Why did my fallen brother save myself, a moron?
There’s no looking back now I guess,
As I grab my brother and slide down, on and on.

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Snigdho Dip Howlader

A computer science student with interest in data and analytics. Hobbies include illustration, writing and music.